The Wildest 'Am I The Jerk?' Stories That Have Everyone Picking Sides

So I (25F) work at this bougie boutique in a luxury mall—think brands like Prada, Louis Vuitton, that kinda thing. The other day, this family walks in about 30 minutes before closing: two women (Emily and Olivia), a guy (Ethan), their daughter (Aria, maybe 9?), and a toddler in a stroller. My coworker, Fiona, was helping them while I started closing up.

I’m vacuuming near the accessories section when I see Aria manhandling a pair of Cartier sunglasses—yeah, the ones that cost more than my rent. She’s bending the arms like they’re cheap plastic, so I walk over, gently take them, and say, “Hey, sweetie, these are super delicate.

Let’s not touch them, okay?” No yelling, no snatching, just a calm reminder. She bolts to her parents without a word, and I put the glasses back. No big deal, right?

Fast forward to checkout. Out of nowhere, Ethan snaps, “If you got a problem with my kid, you come to me.” I’m like, “Uh… sorry?” Then Emily chimes in, “You never talk to our child. You talk to us first.” Ohhh, so these are Aria’s parents. Cool.

I start apologizing— “Sorry, didn’t mean to overstep”—but Ethan storms over, grabs the Cartier shades, slams them on the counter, and goes, “We’ll take these too.” Real subtle, dude.

Meanwhile, Olivia’s muttering in Spanish to Fiona, and the whole family’s side-eyeing me like I kicked their dog. I just finished my register count and dipped. As they left, I threw out another apology (kill me), and I swear I saw Emily smirk.

Once the doors were locked, I lost it. Like, if I’d screamed at Aria or yanked the glasses, sure, be mad. But I was polite! Fiona agreed and said their reaction was wild, especially since I’m usually the “chill” employee. So… AITJ?

Another User Comments:

NTJ at all. Parents who let their kids run loose in stores like that are the worst.

If you don’t want employees correcting your kid, then parent them yourself. Aria was about to turn those sunglasses into modern art, and you stopped it. That’s literally your job.

The family’s reaction reeks of insecurity. Ethan buying the glasses out of spite? Congrats, dude, you played yourself. You just dropped $1,400 to own a retail worker. Meanwhile, you’re teaching your kid that consequences don’t exist unless they’re expensive.

And the whole “don’t talk to my kid” thing? Fine in theory, but if your kid’s unsupervised in a luxury store, you forfeit the right to be picky about who intervenes.

Next time, maybe keep Aria on a leash.

Another User Comments:

YTJ, but softly. Hear me out.

You weren’t wrong to protect the merchandise, but you did overstep by directly correcting someone else’s kid. A better move would’ve been to quietly alert Fiona or the parents first. Some families are super territorial about who disciplines their kids, even if it’s just a gentle reminder.

That said, Ethan and Emily went nuclear over nothing. Buying the glasses to “prove a point” is pathetic. If they’d just said, “Hey, we’d prefer you come to us next time,” this would’ve been a non-issue.

Instead, they turned it into a weird power play.

Another User Comments:

NTJ, and honestly? Stop apologizing.

You didn’t disrespect anyone. You did your job. The family’s reaction was pure ego—they couldn’t handle the implication that their kid might’ve been in the wrong, so they made it about you “looking down” on them. Newsflash: If you’re that insecure, maybe don’t bring your kids into a store where one wrong move costs a paycheck.

Also, Fiona’s a real one for backing you up. Retail’s hard enough without customers inventing drama.

Another User Comments:

ESH.

You could’ve gone to the parents first, but let’s be real—if Aria was seconds away from breaking the glasses, waiting wasn’t an option.

Still, a quick “Hey, just a heads-up!” to Ethan or Emily might’ve avoided the meltdown.

But the family? Total overreaction. Slamming the glasses down like some mic-drop moment? Cringe. And the smug smiles on their way out? Peak immaturity. They wanted to “win,” and you got stuck in the crossfire.

Another User Comments:

NTJ, and I’m side-eyeing anyone saying otherwise.

If a kid’s about to destroy expensive merchandise, you stop them. Period. The idea that you’re supposed to track down the parents first is ridiculous—especially when, surprise, they weren’t even watching their kid.

Ethan and Emily sound like the type of people who think rules don’t apply to them.

Newsflash: Your kid isn’t special. If she’s messing with stuff she shouldn’t, she’s gonna get corrected. Deal with it.

Also, props for keeping your cool. I’d have lost it when they started the Spanish side-commentary.

I’m 26F, and I’ve got two sisters—Aurora, who’s 29, and Brianna, who’s 20. Aurora’s been planning her wedding for months, and let me tell you, her natural talent for being bossy has turned into a full-blown dictatorship.

At first, she had six bridesmaids: me, Brianna, three of her friends, and her future sister-in-law, Fiona. Well, guess what? Her friend Giselle dipped out early because Aurora expected each of us to drop $300 on her bachelorette party. Then Fiona noped out when Aurora demanded that the two blondes in the group (Brianna and Fiona) dye their hair brown so we’d all “match.” Like, seriously?

The stress turned Aurora into even more of a nightmare, especially toward Brianna, who’s always been the quiet, people-pleasing type.

Brianna changed her hair color, lost weight, took a week off work to help with wedding prep, and even agreed to babysit guests’ kids during part of the reception—all because Aurora insisted.

Fast-forward to the wedding day. Aurora was screaming at everyone during hair and makeup. At one point, she caught Brianna eating a snack and made some snide comment about how that’s why she “still looked fat” in her dress. Oh, and by the way, Aurora had gotten Brianna a dress two sizes smaller than everyone else’s. I bit my tongue, trying to remind myself that wedding stress makes people crazy, and I didn’t want to ruin her big day.

I dragged Brianna to another room to finish our makeup, which caused some tension, but Aurora got over it.

Then came the reception drama. Brianna thought she was supposed to watch the kids during the speeches, cake-cutting, and first dances to make sure no little monsters ruined the footage. But before any of that happened, I found Aurora screaming in Brianna’s face in the back of the venue. Apparently, some “essential” footage from the ceremony was ruined because Brianna wasn’t where Aurora wanted her. I stepped in, Aurora started yelling at me, and yeah, I yelled back. She accused us of ruining her wedding, and I told her we’d do better at her next one.

Then Brianna, who’d had a few drinks, threw up from the stress.

Aurora lost it even more. I could handle the yelling, but when she grabbed Brianna’s arm, I was done. I walked out, taking Brianna with me. We missed most of the reception, which meant no maid of honor speech and no free babysitting. Word spread fast, and apparently, everyone was gossiping about what went down.

Brianna didn’t even want to leave—she felt awful, and now Aurora’s giving us the silent treatment. Part of me wonders if I should’ve just sucked it up for a few more hours instead of making a scene.

We’ve always been close, and I hate that this might’ve wrecked our relationship. But I couldn’t just stand there and watch Aurora treat Brianna like garbage, especially when Brianna idolizes her so much.

So, AITJ?

Another User Comments:

“NTJ, and honestly, I would’ve lost it way sooner. Aurora sounds like a nightmare wrapped in bridezilla glitter. The fact that she made Brianna dye her hair, lose weight, and babysit for free is bad enough, but the dress thing? That’s straight-up cruel.

Brianna really needs to work on her self-esteem, though. Therapy could help her set boundaries and realize she doesn’t have to jump through hoops for anyone’s approval, especially not Aurora’s.

And don’t feel guilty for leaving—Aurora created that mess herself. If she didn’t want her wedding ‘ruined,’ maybe she shouldn’t have treated her sisters like unpaid servants.

Also, the silent treatment? Classic manipulation. She’s waiting for you both to come crawling back with apologies. Don’t give her the satisfaction. You stood up for Brianna when she couldn’t stand up for herself, and that’s what matters.”

Another User Comments:

“NTJ. Aurora’s behavior is inexcusable. Stress isn’t a free pass to be a tyrant. The fact that two people already dropped out of the wedding party should’ve been her wake-up call, but instead, she doubled down because she assumed family would put up with her nonsense.

And Brianna?

Poor kid. She’s been conditioned to seek Aurora’s approval, and Aurora took full advantage of that. The weight comments, the too-small dress, the babysitting—it’s all control. You did the right thing by leaving. If you’d stayed, it would’ve just reinforced Aurora’s belief that she can treat people however she wants.

Hold your ground. If anyone owes an apology, it’s Aurora—to both of you, but especially Brianna.”

Another User Comments:

“Y’know, I’m gonna go against the grain here and say ESH (except Brianna). Aurora’s obviously the biggest jerk, but you enabled her for way too long.

You bit your tongue when she insulted Brianna’s weight, when she forced her into a smaller dress, when she made her rearrange her whole life for the wedding.

Yeah, you finally snapped, but why did it take so long? Brianna needed someone in her corner way before the wedding day. Now she’s stuck feeling guilty because Aurora’s playing the victim. You’re not the jerk for leaving, but you kinda are for letting it get that far in the first place.”

Another User Comments:

“NTJ, but Aurora’s not just stressed—she’s abusive. The way she treated Brianna (and you) goes way beyond ‘bridezilla’ behavior.

Making someone change their appearance, monitoring their food, demanding free labor—that’s not wedding stress, that’s control.

Brianna needs therapy, not just for her self-esteem but to recognize how toxic Aurora is. And you? Stop second-guessing yourself. You didn’t ruin the wedding; Aurora did. The only thing you ‘ruined’ was her ability to bully people without consequences.”

Another User Comments:

“Honestly? Soft YTJ. Not for leaving, but for not shutting this down months ago. Aurora’s been treating Brianna like garbage the entire time, and you only stepped in when it got physical. Brianna’s been conditioned to take it, and you kinda let her.

That said, I’m glad you finally walked out.

Aurora’s behavior was disgusting, and Brianna deserved better. But moving forward, don’t wait until things explode to stand up for her. Set boundaries early, or this cycle will just repeat.”

So, a while back, my wife and I added this woman named Aurora on social media. She’s the daughter of one of my parents’ longtime friends, so we’ve always been cool with her. Her feed was mostly travel pics, fancy dinners, that kind of thing. Mine’s usually gym stuff or random quotes from history books I’m into. I’d drop a “Nice shot!” or “Looks awesome!” on her posts, nothing deep.

Then out of nowhere, Aurora starts sliding into my DMs with these aggressive political rants.

I’m not big on arguing online, so I’d just reply with something like, “I see where you’re coming from,” or “Interesting take,” and try to keep it civil. But she kept escalating—throwing insults, dragging out debates way past the point of sanity. Eventually, she unfriended me (but not my wife, lol).

The whole time, I’d show my wife, Celeste, the messages, and she’d be like, “Wow, that’s messed up.” So we seemed to agree Aurora was being a lot.

Fast-forward to a mutual friend’s party. Aurora straight-up ghosted me the entire night.

Meanwhile, I had a chill hour-long convo with her husband, Marcus, about fishing or something random. No drama.

Cut to a year later: Celeste gets invited to Aurora’s baby shower and decides to go. I told her it kinda feels like a slap in the face—this woman spent months trashing me, ignored me in person, and now my wife’s celebrating her life milestones? If one of my buddies disrespected Celeste, they’d be dead to me. Team us, y’know?

Celeste’s not mad at me, but she’s set on going. Her reasoning? “Babies are a big deal, you just show up.” I get that, but… loyalty, man.

AITJ here?

Another User Comments:
NTJ, but also… not totally right either. Look, I get why you’re hurt—Aurora was out of line, and it sucks your wife isn’t matching your energy. But here’s the thing: relationships aren’t always tit-for-tat. Maybe Celeste and Aurora have history you don’t know about, or maybe Celeste just doesn’t wanna burn bridges over social media nonsense.
That said, your feelings are valid. If Aurora was actively trashing you to Celeste, that’d be a hard no. But if they’re just… coexisting? Eh. Let it go. You can’t control who your wife is friends with, and trying to will just cause resentment.

Plus, you’re cool with Marcus, so it’s not like you’re fully boycotting the household. Pick your battles, dude.

Another User Comments:
Y’all are wild for calling OP the jerk. If my partner’s “friend” spent months insulting me and then pretended I didn’t exist, you bet I’d side-eye them going to their party. Loyalty isn’t some optional relationship perk—it’s the bare minimum.
That said, OP, you gotta communicate better. Instead of “don’t go,” try “this hurts me because X.” Maybe Celeste doesn’t realize how deep it cuts.

Or maybe she’s just conflict-averse and thinks showing up is easier. Either way, dig into the why before you die on this hill.

Another User Comments:
ESH. Aurora for being a keyboard warrior, you for expecting Celeste to cut ties, and Celeste for not at least acknowledging your feelings.
Look, social media drama is exhausting, but real-life connections are messy. Maybe Celeste’s just keeping the peace for family friends’ sake. Or maybe she’s being spineless. Either way, ultimatums won’t help. Have a real talk—no accusations, just “hey, this stings, can we figure it out?”

Another User Comments:
Nah, NTJ.

If someone treated my spouse like garbage, they’d be dead to me. Full stop. The fact that Celeste’s still cool with Aurora after seeing those DMs? Weird.
But… is this the hill you wanna die on? If Celeste’s otherwise a great partner, maybe let this one slide. Save the fight for something bigger. And if Aurora’s still a jerk, karma’ll handle it.

Another User Comments:
YTJ, but softly. Hear me out: You’re valid for being hurt, but policing your wife’s friendships is a slippery slope. You hung out with Marcus no problem—why’s Celeste not allowed the same grace?
Plus, baby showers are societal obligation traps.

She might just be going to avoid gossip. Talk it out, but don’t make demands. Trust your wife to have your back when it really matters.

I’m a 37-year-old mom with three kids—Ella (7F), Ethan (10M), and Chloe (13F). My husband, David (38M), is super into health and fitness, which sounds great in theory, but it’s turned into this whole thing where he micromanages what the kids eat. We argue about it constantly.

Last weekend, we decided to treat the kids to dinner at this diner near us. We don’t eat out much, so they were hyped. The server comes over, and Chloe immediately goes, “Bacon cheeseburger, no veggies.” David cuts in like, “Add lettuce and tomato, please.” Chloe’s face just…dropped.

Like, instant disappointment. David didn’t even notice, just kept chatting like nothing happened.

After ordering, David finally picks up on Chloe’s mood and asks what’s wrong. She says, “I hate tomatoes. The texture makes me gag.” David sighs like this is some huge betrayal and goes, “We’ve talked about this. Veggies are non-negotiable.” Chloe’s neurodivergent, and certain foods—especially slimy stuff like tomatoes—are a hard no for her. But David acts like it’s a personal attack if she won’t eat them.

Food arrives, and Chloe’s just poking at her burger, miserable.

The second David heads to the restroom, I swipe the lettuce and tomato off her plate, toss ‘em on mine, and give her a wink. She lights up and devours the burger. David doesn’t say anything until later that night.

Then he hits me with, “You violated my trust. I’m just trying to keep her healthy.” I told him one meal without veggies won’t kill her, but he doubled down like it’s some life-or-death situation. I walked away because, honestly, I was too annoyed to engage. Now we’re barely speaking.

AITJ here? Part of me feels bad because I know he cares about their health, but the other part’s like…dude, let the kid enjoy a burger without turning it into a power struggle.

Another User Comments:

NTJ, but your husband is waving some major red flags.

Controlling what someone eats—especially a neurodivergent kid with texture sensitivities—isn’t “health-conscious,” it’s borderline abusive. Food should never be a battleground. Chloe’s gonna grow up resenting meals if every bite comes with a side of guilt.

And let’s be real, a diner burger isn’t health food to begin with. Acting like lettuce and tomato magically make it nutritious is laughable. If David’s that worried about veggies, maybe he should focus on meals where they’re actually incorporated in a way Chloe can tolerate—like blending spinach into smoothies or roasting carrots till they’re sweet and crispy.

But forcing foods she hates? That’s a fast track to an eating disorder.

Also, calling it a “violation of trust” is wild. Trust is about honesty, not obedience. You’re her mom, not his subordinate. Stand your ground.

Another User Comments:

YTJ, but not for the reason you think. You’re not wrong for wanting Chloe to enjoy her meal, but sneaking around David isn’t the solution. This isn’t just about a burger—it’s about setting a precedent where you two are constantly undermining each other.

David’s being unreasonable, sure, but the answer isn’t to go behind his back.

You guys need to have a real talk about Chloe’s needs. Neurodivergent kids often have legit sensory issues, and forcing foods can backfire hard. Maybe compromise: if Chloe hates raw tomatoes, try sun-dried or sauce. If lettuce is a no, swap in cucumber.

But most importantly, David needs to understand that health isn’t just physical. Mental health matters too, and meals shouldn’t be stressful. Right now, he’s prioritizing control over connection, and that’s a problem.

Another User Comments:

NTJ, and David needs to chill. Lettuce and tomato on a burger aren’t even that nutritious. If he’s so obsessed with health, why’s he okay with the grease-fest that is a bacon cheeseburger in the first place?

The hypocrisy is strong with this one.

Chloe’s old enough to know what she likes. Forcing her to eat stuff she hates isn’t teaching healthy habits—it’s teaching her that her preferences don’t matter. And calling it a “trust violation”? Dramatic much?

Side note: if David’s this controlling over condiments, I shudder to think how he handles bigger issues. Y’all might need couples therapy, stat.

Another User Comments:

ESH except Chloe. David’s being a dictator, but you’re not helping by enabling this sneaky dynamic. Kids pick up on tension, and trust me, they’ll start playing you against each other if this keeps up.

Instead of covert veggie removal, try teamwork.

“Hey David, Chloe’s struggling with textures. Let’s find veggies she can handle.” Maybe she’d do better with roasted peppers or avocado. Or heck, serve a side salad and let her choose how much to eat.

But the silent treatment? Not gonna fix anything. Time to communicate like adults.

Another User Comments:

NTJ, and David’s behavior is low-key alarming. Newsflash: kids are people, not puppets. Chloe’s neurodivergence means her brain processes sensory input differently. Forcing foods can literally trigger anxiety or aversion disorders.

And let’s talk about the bigger picture: David’s not just controlling her plate—he’s dismissing her autonomy.

That’s a slippery slope. What’s next? Policing her clothes? Her friends?

You did the right thing in the moment, but long-term, you gotta advocate for Chloe harder. This isn’t about veggies. It’s about respect.

I’m (17f) turning 18 soon, and I’m throwing this fancy dinner to celebrate. I hired a photographer because I want the night to feel special, and I asked all my friends to send me pics of their outfits beforehand so I could make sure everything looked cohesive. Most of them sent cute, classy fits—think little black dresses, sleek jumpsuits, you get the vibe. Then there’s Avery.

Avery texts me a photo of this… thing. The dress looks like it was sewn together from a 90s couch, and the heels?

Bright orange. With a neon green bag. It was like she raided a thrift store’s reject pile. At first, I tried to be nice. I told her, “Hey, maybe bring a backup outfit just in case you change your mind?” But nope. She doubled down. Said she loved it.

So I leveled with her. “Look, the dress is kinda ugly, and I really don’t want it ruining the vibe of my dinner.” She fired back with, “Good thing I’m the one wearing it, then.” Cool. So I told her if she showed up in that, she wasn’t coming in.

Now she’s upset, saying I’m controlling and shallow.

I get it—people should wear what they want. But it’s my birthday. I’m paying for this whole thing, and I want the photos to look nice. AITJ?

Another User Comments:
YTJ, and honestly, you sound exhausting. Yeah, it’s your birthday, but since when does that give you the right to dictate someone else’s outfit? Avery clearly felt confident in that dress, and instead of hyping her up, you tore her down because it didn’t fit your ~aesthetic~. Newsflash: nobody’s gonna look back at those photos and think, “Wow, that one ugly dress ruined everything.” They’re gonna think, “Darn, OP was a terrible friend.”

You’re 18, not 8.

Grow up and realize that people’s feelings matter more than your Instagram feed. If you’re that obsessed with perfection, maybe don’t invite real humans to your party—hire mannequins instead.

Another User Comments:
Nah, NTJ. People in these comments are acting like you kicked a puppy. It’s your event, and you’re allowed to have standards. If this was some casual hangout, fine, but you’re clearly going for a specific look, and Avery’s outfit sounds like a clown costume.

That said, you could’ve handled it better. Instead of calling it ugly outright, maybe you could’ve said, “Hey, the dress code is more formal/chic—can you swap the orange heels for something neutral?” But at the end of the day, if she refuses to compromise, that’s on her.

Another User Comments:
YTJ, but softly.

I get where you’re coming from—you want everything to be perfect. But perfection is boring, and real friendships aren’t about matching color palettes. Avery’s outfit might’ve been hideous to you, but to her, it was probably fun and expressive.

Instead of uninviting her, you could’ve laughed it off and let it become an inside joke. “Oh my god, Avery’s wearing that dress again” is way more memorable than “Remember when OP threw a fit over fabric?”

Another User Comments:
NTJ, and I’m shocked by the YTJ votes. If this was a wedding or prom, nobody would bat an eye at a dress code.

You’re not asking for designer labels—just something that doesn’t look like a craft project gone wrong.

Avery’s being stubborn for no reason. If my friend told me my outfit didn’t fit the vibe, I’d just… change? It’s not that deep. She’s making this a weird hill to die on.

Another User Comments:
YTJ, and here’s why: you care more about appearances than your actual friend. You had two choices here—let Avery wear her ugly dress and enjoy her company, or die on this hill and lose a friend. You picked the wrong one.

Life’s too short to police outfits.

One day, you’ll look back and cringe at how shallow this was. Hope you apologize before it’s too late.

So, my parents (let’s say Marcus and Elena) are hosting some relatives from their home country for four weeks. Out of nowhere, they drop this bomb on me: “Hey, Casey (that’s me, F26), you’re gonna need to move your stuff to the basement and sleep on an air mattress while they’re here.”

Here’s the thing—I only live with them because they insist I stay. I’ve had a job since I was 16, paid my own way through college, and now I’m working full-time.

I pay them rent for my room, buy groceries, and help around the house. I’m not some freeloader.

When they told me about the whole basement situation, I straight-up said, “If you need a guest room that bad, I can just move out.” And I mean it. There’s a new condo complex nearby with units ready to move into, and I’ve got enough saved to buy one outright. Zero debt, thanks to living frugally these past few years.

But of course, they hit me with the “You’re so ungrateful” and “Why are you always arguing?” routine.

Like, sorry, but it’s kinda messed up to kick me out of a room I pay for without even offering to waive rent for that month. Am I crazy for thinking this isn’t fair?

Another User Comments:

Dude, NTJ at all. You’re literally paying for that room. If your parents want to play hotel hosts, they can either A) put the guests in the basement, B) pay for a hotel, or C) accept that you’re moving out. You’re not some kid crashing rent-free—you’re a tenant. And tenants have rights, even if it’s your parents’ house.

Honestly, this sounds like a power move on their part.

They’re used to calling the shots, and now that you’re standing up for yourself, they’re pulling the “ungrateful” card. Classic guilt-tripping. If you can afford your own place, just go. You’ll save yourself years of this kind of nonsense.

And let’s be real—if you stay, you’ll probably end up playing maid for these guests too. Cooking, cleaning, entertaining… no thanks. Get that condo, enjoy your freedom, and let them figure out their hosting situation without using you as a doormat.

Another User Comments:

Yikes. This is some next-level entitlement from your parents. You’re paying rent, which means that room is yours, at least for the time being.

If they wanted a guest room, they should’ve planned for one instead of treating you like an afterthought.

The fact that they didn’t even offer to adjust your rent for the month is wild. Like, they expect you to pay full price for a room you can’t even use? Nah. That’s not how this works. If they’re that desperate to impress their relatives, they can foot the bill for a hotel.

Also, the emotional manipulation is gross. Calling you “ungrateful” when you’re literally funding part of their household? Please. You’re not a kid anymore, and they need to respect that.

Move out, take control of your life, and don’t look back.

Another User Comments:

Okay, unpopular opinion, but… ESH. Hear me out.

Your parents are obviously out of line for demanding you give up your space without compensation. But at the same time, you’re 26 and clearly capable of living on your own. Why are you still there? You say they insist, but you’re an adult. You don’t need their permission to leave.

Yeah, it’s cheaper to live at home, but at what cost? Your peace of mind? Your independence? This whole situation is a mess, and the longer you stay, the more of this you’ll have to deal with.

Just rip off the bandaid and go.

Another User Comments:

NTJ, but you’re kinda being a pushover. You pay rent. You contribute. You’re not some kid mooching off them. Stand your ground!

If they want to kick you out of your room, they can at least have the decency to ask instead of demanding. And yeah, waiving rent for that month should be a given. The fact that they didn’t even consider it shows how little they respect your contributions.

Also, the basement? An air mattress? For a month? That’s just disrespectful. You’re not a college kid crashing for the weekend—you live there.

If they can’t see how messed up this is, maybe it’s time to show them what life looks like without your rent money.

Another User Comments:

I get that cultural expectations can complicate things, but come on. You’re not a child, and your parents aren’t doing you some huge favor by letting you stay—you’re paying your way.

If they’re so concerned about hospitality, they can be the ones sacrificing their comfort. Why should you downgrade to a basement while their guests get the luxury of your room? The entitlement is staggering.

Move out. Not just because of this, but because you deserve to live life on your own terms.

You’ve worked hard, you’re financially stable, and you don’t owe them your independence. Go enjoy your condo and let them figure out their own hosting drama.

So, my parents are going through a messy divorce right now, and honestly, it’s been a lot. My mom, Jenna, has some serious anxiety or OCD—she’s never been diagnosed, but it’s obvious to everyone except her. She refuses to get help, and it’s made my life way harder than it needs to be.

I’m 16, and I still can’t be home alone. She had a tracker on my phone until my dad, Ethan, found out and shut it off.

I wasn’t allowed to hang out with friends unless she personally knew their parents, no parties, no sleepovers, no part-time jobs, and definitely no driving. She even had to “approve” my friends, and she hated my best friend, Avery, because her mom, Robin, is “irresponsible.” (Robin lets Avery drive a golf cart around their neighborhood—legal here at 14—and Avery’s home alone a few nights a week because Robin works late. Big deal, right?)

The divorce finally happened after my mom went to visit her family for a week. While she was gone, Ethan actually let me live. I hung out with friends, got my learner’s permit (he signed me up for driver’s ed behind her back), and even stayed at Avery’s place when Robin was working.

When Jenna found out, she lost it. Filed for divorce, blamed Ethan for “endangering” me, and now here we are.

I chose to live with Ethan, no question. When I was 10, they separated for almost a year, and Jenna wouldn’t let me see him at all. That still stings. Now, she shows up at our house multiple times a week, demanding I go with her, blowing up my phone. I don’t answer. Every conversation is the same: trashing my friends, calling Ethan reckless, ranting about how the world’s out to get me. I’m exhausted.

But lately, I’ve been feeling guilty.

Like, should I be trying harder? Am I the jerk for avoiding her completely?

Another User Comments:

Nah, you’re not the jerk here. Your mom’s behavior is way over the top, and it’s totally reasonable to choose the parent who actually lets you breathe. That said, cutting her off completely might backfire—divorce is messy, and courts can get weird about stuff like that. Maybe talk to Ethan about setting up super structured contact. Like, one short call a week, or meeting her for coffee in a public place where she’s less likely to go nuclear. Boundaries are everything right now.

Also, keep a record of her behavior—dates she showed up unannounced, screenshots of crazy texts, whatever.

If she ever tries to pull legal stuff to force visitation or whatever, you’ll have proof of why that’s a bad idea. And therapy, if you can swing it. Not because you’re the problem, but because dealing with this level of control messes with your head long-term. You don’t wanna realize at 25 that you’re still second-guessing every decision because of her.

Another User Comments:

Dude, your mom needs professional help, and you’re not obligated to be her emotional support animal until she gets it. The golf cart thing? Hilarious that she thinks that’s irresponsible when she’s out here treating you like you’re made of glass.

The guilt you’re feeling?

Classic manipulation fallout. She’s trained you to feel bad when you don’t obey, and that’s not okay. You’re 16—you should be figuring out who you are, not walking on eggshells to manage her anxiety.

That said, if you ever do want to rebuild a relationship with her, wait until she’s actually gotten help. Right now, she’s just gonna drag you into her chaos. And for the love of god, don’t let her isolate you from Ethan. He sounds like the only sane one in this mess.

Another User Comments:

Okay, hot take: your mom’s not just anxious, she’s controlling to the point of being emotionally abusive.

No sleepovers at 16? Tracking your phone? That’s not protection, that’s paranoia. And the fact that she kept you from Ethan during their last separation? Major red flag.

You’re not wrong for choosing stability. But be careful—parents like her often escalate when they lose control. If she starts threatening custody stuff or showing up at your school, get Ethan to lawyer up. And maybe check out r/raisedbynarcissists. Even if she’s not a full-blown narcissist, the strategies there for dealing with overbearing parents might help.

Another User Comments:

I get why you feel guilty, but seriously—this divorce isn’t your fault.

It’s about her inability to cope, not you living a normal teenage life. My mom was like this (minus the divorce), and it took me years to stop feeling like I owed her for… existing?

Therapy helped. So did moving out. You’ve got two years until you’re 18—start planning now. Get a job if you can (Ethan seems cool with it), save money, and make sure you’ve got all your important docs somewhere safe. If she’s this bad now, she might lose it when you’re legally an adult and she can’t control you anymore.

Another User Comments:

Man, this hits close to home.

My dad was the same way—freaked out if I so much as walked to the corner store. Difference is, my mom enabled him. At least Ethan has your back.

You’re not the jerk for protecting your peace. But if you ever doubt yourself, remember: normal parents don’t have to force their kids to love them. They earn it by being trustworthy. Right now, your mom’s doing the opposite. Until that changes, distance is self-care.

My parents drilled it into my head from day one that education was non-negotiable. My grandpa couldn’t afford to help my dad through college, so Dad had to grind through multiple part-time jobs just to scrape by. He never blamed his parents for it, but he made darn sure my brother, Connor (29), and I (F22) knew how much it sucked—missing out on clubs, parties, networking, all that stuff because he was too busy working.

So Dad laid out his deal early: Get into college, and I’ll cover everything—tuition, rent, even your weird underwater basket-weaving elective.

I took that seriously, aced undergrad, and Dad held up his end. Connor? Not so much. He dropped out after freshman year and has been bouncing between random part-time gigs ever since, still living at home rent-free.

Fast-forward to now—I got into my dream grad program, and Dad offered to foot the bill again. Cue Connor’s meltdown. Turns out, he and his buddy, Ben, were planning to use his share of the money to start some sketchy-sounding “e-sports coaching business.” Dad shut that down real quick, reminding him the money was only for school. Community college? Fine. Trade school? Sure. But no degree, no cash.

Honestly, I think Connor’s got it pretty good.

My parents still pay for his food and roof, which is more than most people get. But now he’s giving me the silent treatment and threatening to boycott family holidays, which is wrecking my mom. I feel kinda guilty because yeah, I do want the money—grad school debt is no joke—but at the same time… Dad’s rules were crystal clear, and Connor had a decade to go back if he wanted it.

Another User Comments:

Okay, let’s break this down. Your brother’s been mooching off your parents for ten years—no rent, no bills, just vibes and part-time jobs.

And now he’s mad he can’t cash in on money that was explicitly for education? Nah. That’s not how this works.

If he’d actually gone to school, sure, he’d have a case. But he didn’t. And let’s be real, skipping family events when he lives there? Hilarious. He’s gonna sulk in his room during Thanksgiving? Please. The second he smells pie, he’ll come crawling out.

Take the money, get your degree, and don’t let his tantrums get to you. If you really wanna be nice, maybe pay your dad back later when you’re rolling in grad-school money.

But Connor? He made his bed. If he wants a business, he can get a business degree—or, wild idea, save up like the rest of us.

Another User Comments:

Your brother’s entitlement is astounding. Dad’s deal was simple: school = money. No school? No money. Connor’s acting like this is some big betrayal, but he’s the one who walked away from the deal.

And let’s talk about this “business” idea. Dude’s been working part-time for years with no plan, and now he suddenly has a genius entrepreneurial vision? With no degree, no experience, and (I’m guessing) no savings?

Yeah, that’s not a business—that’s a money pit.

Your dad’s being more than fair. Connor’s lucky he’s not paying rent. Take the grad school funds and don’t look back. Just don’t expect him to forgive you anytime soon—but honestly, if this is how he acts, maybe that’s not a loss.

Another User Comments:

I’m gonna play devil’s advocate here. Yeah, your dad’s rules were clear, but have you considered how this looks from Connor’s side? He’s watching you get another degree funded while he’s stuck at home.

That’s gotta sting, even if it’s his own fault.

That said, he’s handling it like a toddler. Threatening to skip holidays? Petty. But maybe there’s a compromise—could your dad front him a small loan if he actually puts together a solid business plan? Not the full amount, but something to show there’s still support?

Still, at the end of the day, it’s your dad’s money. If Connor wants a shot, he should go back to school. Otherwise, he’s just gotta accept the consequences.

Another User Comments:

Your brother’s acting like this money was just sitting in a vault with his name on it.

News flash: it wasn’t. It was always for education, not a “do whatever you want” fund.

And let’s be real—if your dad gave him that cash for a business, it’d be gone in six months, and Connor would still be in your parents’ basement. At least with grad school, there’s a guaranteed return on investment.

Don’t feel bad. Your dad’s being smart with his money, and Connor’s just mad he can’t freeload more.

Another User Comments:

I get why Connor’s upset—it does feel unfair when one kid gets “more.” But life’s not fair.

He had the same opportunity and blew it.

That said, your mom’s caught in the crossfire, and that sucks. Maybe sit down with Connor (when he’s cooled off) and see if there’s a way to salvage things. Not about the money—that ship has sailed—but about the family dynamic.

But yeah, take the grad school money. You earned it.

So, my (f26) long-distance partner (m30), Alex, just stayed over for the first time at my place. Let me tell you, it was… enlightening.

I’m the kind of person who showers daily—no ifs, ands, or buts. My skin and hair are basically oil factories, and skipping a shower isn’t an option unless I want to look like I’ve been deep-fried by noon. I’ve tried the whole “shower less to train your skin” thing before, and surprise, it doesn’t work for me.

Meanwhile, Alex showers every three days. Cool for him, I guess, but personally, I find it kinda gross. I didn’t say anything though, because hey, his body, his rules.

Except he didn’t extend me the same courtesy. He spent half the visit lecturing me about how daily showers are a waste of water, bad for the environment, and just plain unnecessary. He even suggested I switch to “bird baths” (aka wiping down with a washcloth) on off days. I told him no, obviously, because a) I bike to work and get sweaty, and b) I know my own skin better than he does.

Well, that set him off.

He called me selfish, said I wasn’t even trying to consider his opinion, and then stormed out to sulk in my backyard. Like, full-on pouting next to my tomato plants.

Now I’m sitting here wondering if I’m actually the jerk. I mean, he’s only here for a week—should I just suck it up to keep the peace? Or is it reasonable to insist on basic bodily autonomy in my own heck house?

Another User Comments:

Nah, you’re not the jerk here. Alex’s being ridiculous. Showering habits are super personal, and what works for one person doesn’t work for another.

I have a partner who can go days without showering and still smell like a meadow, while I’m over here needing two showers a day in summer just to function.

The real issue isn’t even the showering—it’s the fact that he’s making your hygiene his hill to die on. Like, why does he care so much? It’s not like you’re demanding he showers more. You’re just existing in your own body the way you know works best.

Plus, the sulking? That’s manipulative as heck. Instead of having an adult conversation, he’s trying to guilt you into compliance.

Major red flag. If he’s this controlling over something as trivial as shower frequency, what’s next? Dictating what you eat? How you dress?

Stand your ground. If he can’t respect your basic bodily autonomy, this relationship isn’t gonna work long-term.

Another User Comments:

Okay, hot take: Alex’s not entirely wrong about the environmental impact of daily showers, but he’s going about it in the worst way possible.

Yeah, reducing water usage is good. But you know what’s better? Not being a condescending jerk to your partner. If he actually cared, he’d suggest compromises—like switching to a low-flow showerhead or cutting shower time—instead of demanding you change your entire routine to match his.

Also, the hypocrisy is wild.

He’s fine with his own three-day shower schedule, but you’re the problem for not bending to his preferences? Nah.

At the end of the day, this isn’t about showers. It’s about respect. He doesn’t get to police your body, period. If he can’t handle that, maybe he should date someone who naturally vibes with his shower philosophy instead of trying to reprogram you.

Another User Comments:

Y’all are missing the bigger picture. This isn’t about hygiene—it’s about control.

Alex’s a guest in your home, and instead of being grateful or respectful, he’s picking fights over how you wash yourself.

That’s not normal behavior. That’s the kind of thing that starts small (“shower less”) and escalates (“stop wearing that,” “don’t talk to them”).

The fact that he called you names for setting a boundary is a huge red flag. Healthy partners don’t throw tantrums when they don’t get their way. They discuss, compromise, or drop it.

Honestly? I’d be rethinking the whole relationship. If he’s this pushy over something as minor as showering, imagine how he’ll act when real disagreements come up.

Another User Comments:

I’m gonna play devil’s advocate here—kind of.

Alex’s delivery sucks, no question.

Sulking and name-calling is immature. But I do think there’s room for compromise in relationships, even on stuff like this.

Maybe instead of daily full showers, you could try a quick rinse on some days? Or use dry shampoo between washes? Not because he’s demanding it, but because it might be a middle ground that works for both of you.

That said, if you’ve already tried alternatives and they don’t work for you, he needs to back off. Relationships are about mutual respect, not unilateral demands.

Another User Comments:

LOL at Alex acting like you’re single-handedly destroying the planet by showering daily.

Does he also walk everywhere to save gas? Grow his own food? Never use plastic?

The environmental argument is such a cop-out. If he actually cared, he’d focus on systemic issues—like corporations polluting oceans—instead of harassing his partner over her shower habits.

This reeks of performative activism. He wants to feel superior, not make a real difference. Dude needs to get over himself.

My wife, Carla, and I got married about five years ago after going out for three. We met in college—she was studying graphic design, and I was knee-deep in computer science. After graduation, I landed a decent gig as a software dev, and she started working at a marketing firm. Things were good. We bought a little house, settled in, and last year, we had our first kid, a baby girl named Mia.

Now, here’s where things got messy. After Mia was born, Carla hated being away from her.

Like, full-on breakdowns at the thought of going back to work. So, after a lot of talking (and a fair amount of crying), we agreed she’d quit and stay home. I make enough to cover us, but just barely. Between the mortgage, diapers, and all the other fun adulting expenses, I’ve had to pick up extra hours. I’m talking 70-80 a week, coming home at 10 PM most nights.

Here’s the kicker: Carla cooks for herself but not me. Like, she’ll make a whole stir-fry, eat it, and leave me to fend for myself. Laundry? Also on me. The only chores she handles are cleaning and taking care of Mia, which, don’t get me wrong, is a ton of work.

But I’m running on fumes, man. The other night, I asked if she could throw something together for me, and she hit me with, “I’m not your maid.” Cue the biggest fight we’ve had in years.

I get it—being a stay-at-home mom isn’t easy. But neither is working like a dog just to keep the lights on. Am I wrong for wanting one hot meal when I drag myself through the door?

Another User Comments:

Dude, NTJ. Look, I’ve been in a similar spot. My ex refused to lift a finger at home while I was pulling 12-hour shifts, and let me tell you, resentment builds fast.

The thing is, marriage is supposed to be a partnership. If she’s home all day, yeah, taking care of a baby is exhausting, but cooking an extra portion of pasta isn’t rocket science. It’s not about being a maid—it’s about basic consideration. You’re killing yourself to provide, and she can’t even toss a lasagna in the oven for you? Come on.

That said, this sounds like there’s more going on. Maybe she’s feeling unappreciated or overwhelmed. But shutting you out and refusing to help isn’t the answer. You guys need to sit down and hash this out before it spirals.

Maybe counseling? Because right now, it sounds like you’re roommates, not partners.

Another User Comments:

Okay, unpopular opinion, but soft YTJ. Hear me out.

You’re working insane hours, and that sucks. No argument there. But being a SAHM isn’t just “staying home.” It’s 24/7 childcare, cleaning, emotional labor—all of it. You get to clock out (even if it’s late); she doesn’t. Maybe she’s burnt out too.

Instead of demanding food, maybe ask why she’s refusing. Is she touched out from the baby? Feeling isolated? You framing it as “Hey, I’m struggling.

How can we fix this together?” Because right now, you’re both keeping score, and that never ends well.

Another User Comments:

NTJ, and I’ll die on this hill.

If the roles were reversed—if she was working 80 hours and you were home refusing to lift a finger—people would be screaming divorce. The double standard is wild. You’re not asking for a five-course meal. You’re asking for leftovers.

She chose to quit her job. That means picking up the slack at home. If she doesn’t like it, she can go back to work and split chores 50/50. But she doesn’t get to opt out of both.

Marriage isn’t a buffet where you only take what you like.

Another User Comments:

ESH.

You’re both acting like this is a competition. News flash: it’s not. You’re tired? So is she. She’s not cooking for you? Yeah, that’s crappy. But instead of talking like adults, you’re both sulking.

Here’s a radical idea: meal prep on Sundays. Crockpot dinners. Communication. And maybe, just maybe, acknowledge that you’re both drowning instead of pointing fingers.

Another User Comments:

NTJ, but this isn’t about food.

This is about respect. You’re breaking your back for your family, and she’s treating you like an afterthought.

That’s not okay. But before you blow up the marriage, try one last talk. Lay it all out—how exhausted you are, how unappreciated you feel. If she still doesn’t care? Then you’ve got bigger problems than cold dinners.

So my husband, Cameron, has this bizarre hang-up about eggplants and bananas. He refuses to eat them because he’s convinced they’ll somehow make him less masculine—like, bro, it’s a vegetable (and a fruit, technically, but whatever). His reasoning is so wild that his sisters, Ava and Zoe, and I started low-key trolling him by sneaking eggplant into his meals.

Every time we pulled it off, we’d snap a pic and drop it in our group chat with some dumb joke like, “Cameron’s testosterone levels just dropped by 10% lol.” Since I’m his wife and do most of the cooking, I was the MVP of this operation.

Well, karma’s a jerk.

Cameron saw the messages when he borrowed my phone to text Ava. Dude lost it. Like, full-on nuclear meltdown—yelling in front of our 3-year-old, Liam, which is a hard rule we never break. I tried defusing it with a joke—”So, did the eggplant turn you into a fairy?”—which, in hindsight, was maybe not the move.

He went off about betrayal, trust, how we’re all snakes, and even called me a narcissist for getting a kick out of tricking him. Then he dropped the bomb: “Liam, your mom’s a lying jerk, so say goodbye to us being a happy family.” Oh, and he threatened divorce.

Cool.

I did apologize, but he’s acting like I poisoned him. Now he’s got this list of demands to “rebuild trust,” and some feel excessive. Like, dude, it’s an eggplant, not an affair. But part of me wonders—was I actually the jerk here?

Another User Comments:

Okay, let’s break this down. Cameron’s hang-up is ridiculous, no doubt. But here’s the thing—you knew it mattered to him, even if it’s stupid. Sneaking food into someone’s meals as a “joke” isn’t just teasing; it’s a breach of trust.

And the group chat? That’s straight-up mocking him behind his back.

Imagine if Cameron had some weird fear of, say, clowns, and you and his sisters started hiding clown pics in his stuff while laughing about it in a secret chat. You’d feel pretty betrayed, right? It’s not about the eggplant—it’s about the disrespect.

And yeah, his reaction was over-the-top, especially dragging your kid into it. But you did keep this going for who knows how long. If my partner lied to me repeatedly for laughs, I’d be irritated too. You’re not the jerk, but you’re a jerk in this situation.

Another User Comments:

Nah, Cameron’s the real problem here.

Dude’s out here acting like eggplants are gonna turn him into a Broadway dancer. That’s not a “boundary,” that’s fragile masculinity on steroids.

But here’s where you messed up: you played into it instead of calling him out. Instead of saying, “Babe, that’s insane, let’s talk about why you think this,” you and his sisters turned it into a prank war. And yeah, pranks are fun—until they’re not.

His reaction? Unhinged. Threatening divorce over eggplant? Telling your kid the family’s doomed? That’s emotional manipulation. You screwed up, but he’s taking it to Defcon 1.

Another User Comments:

Y’all are wild.

Cameron’s allowed to not eat certain foods, no matter how dumb the reason. You don’t get to decide what’s “valid” for someone else.

What you did wasn’t a joke—it was bullying. You tricked him, documented it, and laughed at him. That’s messed up. And the fact that you’re still downplaying it (“it’s just an eggplant”) shows you don’t get it.

His trust is shattered because you proved you’ll lie to him for fun. And yeah, his reaction was extreme, but can you blame him? You’re his wife.

You’re supposed to have his back, not team up with his sisters to humiliate him.

Another User Comments:

Hot take: Cameron’s insecurity is the real villain here. Dude’s so scared of being perceived as “gay” that he’s banning vegetables? That’s some next-level toxic masculinity.

But the author, you handled this terribly. Instead of challenging his weird beliefs, you reinforced them by making it a game. Now he’s got “proof” that you’re all out to emasculate him.

His divorce threat is probably empty, but this whole thing exposed bigger issues. He’s insecure, you’re dismissive, and neither of you communicates well.

Couples therapy might help, but only if he’s willing to admit his hang-ups are irrational too.

Another User Comments:

I’m stuck on the fact that you did this while pregnant. Like, hormones or not, how did you think this would end well?

Cameron’s being a drama queen, but you kept pushing his buttons. And the group chat receipts? That’s just evidence of you all ganging up on him. Of course he feels betrayed.

You’re not the jerk, but you’re not innocent. He needs to chill, but you need to take this seriously. Trust isn’t rebuilt with half-assed apologies.

Stop downplaying it and listen to why he’s hurt.

My brother, Lucas, has been married to his wife, Caroline, for around 12 years now. He’s got a 14-year-old daughter, Sophia, and Caroline has a 15-year-old, Olivia.

Sophia’s crazy smart—like, her teachers are already talking Ivy League potential. So my sister, Amanda, and I have been quietly stashing cash for her college fund since she was little. Now that Sophia’s about to start high school, we were all talking about where she should go. Lucas mentioned this elite private school nearby, the kind with insane academics but also a price tag that makes your eyes water.

He’d love to send both girls there, but financially? No shot. So the plan was for both Sophia and Olivia to go to the same public high school.

After some back-and-forth, Amanda and I told Lucas we could actually swing the private school for Sophia if we dipped into her college fund a bit. We’d done the math, and it was doable without wrecking her future plans.

Then Caroline hit us with, “What about Olivia?” We had to shut that down fast—the rest of the money was strictly for Sophia’s college, no wiggle room. Now Caroline’s acting like we’re the villains for “playing favorites.”

Another User Comments:

“Look, you’re not technically wrong, but this feels like a messy situation waiting to blow up.

Lucas and Caroline were trying to keep things fair between the girls, and now you’re swooping in to disrupt that balance. Yeah, it’s your money, and yeah, you can do what you want with it, but have you thought about how this’ll play out at home?

Sophia’s getting this golden ticket while Olivia’s stuck watching from the sidelines. That’s gonna breed resentment, and not just from Olivia—Caroline’s already salty, and Lucas’s stuck in the middle. If you really wanna help, maybe keep the college fund intact and see if the private school offers scholarships. ... Click here to continue reading